Being single: don’t single it out.



Part one.

There’s much negativity attached to the notion of being single. There are far much bad labels to do with it.  Possibly, it could be the making of one’s existence. Yes, and surely we all want a taste of romantic love. We want to experience what all those lyrics in the moonlit, happy charts songs. We want to feel that way,without a doubt.

I can’t deny that kind of feeling is absolute enchantment. But whenfailed has crushing side effects. Then we rotate on a cycle, back to craving that feeling once again. Hoping the next time it will last.

Delicately, we are faced with a decision for the time being to stay without a lover. That to say the least does not mean we stay without love. Love from oneself is the cliché emphasized upon universally. To love one is a path all are willing to agree with but hardly put into practice. Some people will take this time to work on themselves. Some would become more narcissistically in love with how they look or their idea of power, whether in work and sexuality- This is all ammunition for the ego. They will fall in love with a self inflated version of themselves but never really love themselves. This is to say what love is not.

However, at the same time this is the expectation. We want to be loved for who we are when we don’t really know ourselves authentically. We spend time fixing ourselves on things we deem as important. We want to be loved through bad times, at our messiest and our most difficult. We want to be accepted when it comes to aspects of ourselves we can’t really digest. But then, truthfully, we can’t really grasp all the baggage we can’t carry.

Once ego falls away, the ultimate leftover is the authentic self. If someone was to fall in love with the ego or the version of yourself you wish to be portraying for the mere fact you believe this is much greater than your actuality you set yourself up for great disaster. Once the curtains falls, shows is over. All go home. You may believe you were at your best and why he or she didn’t still love you. When how could they? Ego is a checkmate. Your authentic self is unfolding always.

Sometimes we seek lovers in order for us to fulfil completeness. Again, some will argue that we aren’t born to be alone, and through loving another we heal aspects of us that can only be healed through extending that love in another. What we can’t love in us, we love in another.

And love, is about giving.  The more you are the more you have to give. The more energy you gain from having the alone time, is never going or run out. Once you get one with the universe, you get one with your true state of being, as Eckhart Tolle calls it. I call it; you’re at one with your Godliness. Only then can you find the one.

“When the soul is ready, the mate appears”.

Find it a recharge, reflection and a chance to better you for a better, suitable lover. A love that suits your genuine needs rather than what you think your needs are. Many will love you for the beauteous self, but your uninviting self, you might want persons with a bit more might.

Although some say we weren’t born to be alone, alone time is crucial for ones spiritual development. I’d much rather spend time getting to know who I am, then in the company of them who want a more animated version.

A consequence of not your single time bright eyed will set you up for a rotation of a stream of deflating relationships. Not being able to offer what you have along with being able to raise the bar on what you’re willing to accept will only forfeit you of better chances real love has to offer.



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